i feel to...

Know how to express whatever you want to say is something that really excites me,i know i'm too late for this kind of blog thing,but its better than nothing at all right? I'm a quiet an open minded person, i mean i dont mind hangout with gay or lesbian and socialize with them,but i dont know why its kinda hard for me sometimes to tell what my heart want to say.


I sometimes afraid that i am a boring person to be with. Well, mostly people i hangout with say i am not but i feel that way sometimes. Working as an accounting staff for the past 5 years its really boring thing. Same office, same friends, same desk, same books,same way to count every single day,dont u think its boring? Hell YES! So, i dont know much about whats going outside there,there are newspapers,it helps me just a little bit but i think i need more interaction with new people, new environment. And maybe new job is on the list i have to do soon. And would love to go back to school,and because i am a javanese woman my parents they really want me to get married before i am turning to be 30. Well i think its quite hard to be real, as i am no longer back to be single after 2 unsuccesfull relationship with 2 guys for the past 6 years.. what a wasted time. Hope they understand there's thing more important than a marriage. My happiness. I am happy to be single at the moment. And to be honest i feel bored with the thing called love,its always happy in the beginning  but end up with the tears on my face. The process would be-introducing-chatting-going-dating-smiling-lovemaking-fighting-breaking-crying-and thats all...mostly all the same.. Does true love still exist at this modernity of life?


I feel to know what's the answer.....


Be happy and be gratefull of life that i have now,its boring but it is still good thou..

:)